Oh, well

i found this interesting blog called 'I Wrote This For You'
the writer expressed everything he/she felt and wrote it down just for this 'you'. i think it's their ex. they don't care if people don't get what it's all about, or thought that their writings also express what other people's feelings. 'cause they know their ex'll know what it means.
the writings comes with great pictures. really, you should see it.
here's 1 of my favourite and showed my feelings :

"But really, all we want, and I speak for the entire human race here, is contact. Someone to let us know that we aren't alone. That the world isn't a dream and you and I really are happening at the same time, even if it's not in the same place. That this is real. You're really there. I'm really here. We're real."

damn i'm hopeless.
i really am.
why am i always like someone who doesn't even notice me?
well, not that he doesn't know me, but really.
i feel like it's impossible to happen.
even sometimes i thought that maybe it is not impossible and anything is possible,
but i don't want to have high hopes.
i just like someone who calls me 'der' instead of 'je'. :(

oh well, i'm talking crap again.

gw lg down, ngerasa ga percaya diri dan ngerasa sendiri.
temen gw banyak dan gw lg ga ada masalah sama siapapun. orang tua gw lg suportif banget.
tapi kenapa gw ngerasa kaya gini (lagi)?
gw udh capek kaya gini terus! bosen!
i need support.
i need attention.
from someone who's really gonna be there for me all the time no matter what.
notice me.
i'm here.

beberapa hari yg lalu gw baca blog dan nemu quote yang kayanya (mestinya) bisa bangkitin smangat gw. kira2 intinya gini (gw lupa keseluruhannya) :

"if you're feeling down and lonely, just remember that someone out there is thinking of you."

hopefully someone is. *sigh..

gw baru nonton Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind.
film itu adalah keren.


















intinya kalo lo bener2 cinta sama seseorang ,walaupun lo udah berusaha sekuat tenaga buat ngelupain orang itu,pasti ujung2nya lo emang bakal ditakdirkan buat bersama lagi. even if you use some kind of medical thing to erase your memory.

setelah nonton film itu gw jadi mikir. coba ingatan gw bisa dihapus. apa yang bakal terjadi ya? mungkin gw ga bakal jadi kaya sekarang. mungkin gw ga perlu ngelakuin / ngerasain hal-hal bodoh yang sering gw lakuin sekarang. dan mungkin gw jadi tau whether that someone is my soulmate or not.

speaking of soulmate. mendadak kok gw jadi kepikiran siapa soulmate gw. kapan gw bakal nemuin dia. apa orang seperti gw merupakan seseorang yang proper untuk dijadiin someone else's soulmate? atau gw ga lebih dari sekedar teman baik. i don't know then. maybe it's just me. or not. whatever.